My most frequent recommendations for books/videos
Ever wonder what your counselor is reading?
I frequently update this list but here are a few of my most commonly recommended titles in session.
For Religious Trauma Syndrome/ Spiritual Abuse:
- “You Are Your Own: A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity” by Jamie Lee Finch
- “Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion” by Marlene Winell
- “Deadly Doctrine: Health, Illness, and Christian God-Talk” by Wendell W. Watters
- “The Psychology of Religious Fundamentalism, 1st Edition” by by Ralph W. Hood Jr.
For Letting Go:
- “A Mind at Home with Itself: How Asking Four Questions Can Free Your Mind, Open Your Heart, and Turn Your World Around” by Byron Katie
- “Solve for Happy: Engineer Your Path to Joy” by Mo Gawdat
- “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle
- “When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times” by Pema Chodron
- “Tears to Triumph: the Spiritual Journey from Suffering to Enlightenment” by Marianne Williamson
- “Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life” by Byron Katie
- “Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take the Lead” by Tosha Silver
For Children of Dysfunctional Families:
- “Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life ” by Dr. Susan Forward
- “Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: A Guide and Map for Recovering from Childhood Trauma” by Pete Walker
- “Warming the Stone Child: Myths and Stories about Abandonment and the Un-mothered Child” by Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes (Audio)
For Getting Over The Need for Other’s Approval:
- “I Need Your Love – Is That True? How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciate and Start Finding Them Instead” by Byron Katie
- “I Thought it Was Just Me (But it Isn’t): Making the Journey from ‘What Will People Think?’ to ‘I am Enough’.” by Dr. Brene Brown, LMSW
- “Obsessive Love: When it Hurts Too Much To Let Go” by Dr. Susan Forward
Empowerment/ Goals/ Life Purpose:
- “A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose” by Eckhart Tolle
- “Untamed” by Glennon Doyle
- “The Four Agreements: a Practical Guide to Personal Freedom” by Don Miguel Ruiz & Janet Mills
- “The ONE Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results” By Gary Keller
- “Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less” by Greg McKeown
- “Life Visioning: A Transformative Process for Activating Your Unique Gifts & Highest Potential” by Michael Bernard Beckwith
- “Living Forward: a Proven Plan to Stop Drifting and Get the Life You Want” by Michael Hyatt and Daniel Harkavy
- “The 5 Second Rule: Transform Your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage” by Mel Robbins
- “Take Charge of Your Life: How to Get What You Need With Choice Theory” by Dr. William Glasser
- “You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life” by Jen Sincero
- “Warrior Goddess Training: Become the Woman You Are Meant to Be” by Heatherash Amara
- “Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype” by Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes
- “The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are; Your Guide to a Wholehearted Life” by Dr. Brene Brown, LMSW
- “Rising Strong” by Dr. Brene Brown, LMSW
- “Carry On, Warrior: Thoughts on Life Unarmed” by Glennon Doyle Melton
- “Soul-Shaping: a Journey of Self-Creation” by Jeff Brown
Memoirs on Mental Health:
- “Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed” by Lori Gottlieb
- “The Men on my Couch: True Stories of Sex, Love, and Psychotherapy” by Dr. Brandy Engler with David Resin
- “An Unquiet Mind: a Memoir of Moods and Madness” by Kay Redfield Jamison (Bipolar/ Manic-Depressive Illness)
- “All of Me: How I Learned to Live With the Many Personalities Sharing My Body” by Kim Noble (Dissociative Identity Disorder)
- “Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery From Borderline Personality Disorder” by Rachel Reiland
- “Boy Erased: a Memoir” by Garrard Conley (Homosexuality & Conversion Therapy)
- “The Kiss” by Kathryn Harrison (Incest)
- “True Crimes: a Family Album” by Kathryn Harrison (Essays on love, loss, and family secrets)
Spirituality/ Health/ Wellness:
- “How to be Here: A Guide to Creating a Life Worth Living” by Rob Bell
- “Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself” by Dr. Lissa Rankin
- “The Fear Cure: Cultivating Courage as Medicine for the Body, Mind, and Soul” by Dr. Lissa Rankin
- “The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma” by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.
- “Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha” by Dr. Tara Brach
- “True Refuge: Finding Peace and Freedom in Your Own Awakened Heart” by Dr. Tara Brach
- “The Untethered Soul: the Journey Beyond Yourself” by Michael Singer
- “Somebody Should Have Told Us! (Simple Truths for Living Well) ” by Jack Pransky
Mindfulness/ Eastern Flavorings:
- Pensacola’s very own Michael Brant DeMaria of Ontos for guided meditation & music
- “Unplug: A Simple Guide to Meditation For Busy Skeptics and Modern Soul Seekers” by Suze Yalof Schwartz
- “Shakti Rising: Embracing Shadow and Light on the Goddess Path to Wholeness” by Kavitha M. Chinnaiyan MD
- “Breath by Breath: the Liberating Practice of Insight Meditation” by Larry Rosenberg & David Guy
- “Zen Confidential: Confessions of a Wayward Monk” by Shozan Jack Haubner
- “The Wise Heart: a Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology” by Jack Kornfield
- “What the Buddha Taught” by Walpola Rahula
- “Change Your Thoughts – Change Your Life: Living the Wisdom of the Tao” by Dr. Wayne Dyer
- “The Tao of Pooh” by Benjamin Hoff
- “The Te of Piglet” by Benjamin Hoff
- “Going on Being: Buddhism and the Way of Change” by Dr. Mark Epstein
- “Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body & Mind to Face Stress, Pain, & Illness” by Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn
- “Pebbles and Pearls” by Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn
- “The Book of Secrets: Unlocking the Hidden Dimensions of Your Life” by Deepak Chopra
Mindset/ Positive or Sacred Psychology/ Law of Attraction:
- “Mindset Magic: Using Scientific & Spiritual Principles” to Create Your Life by Krysti Turznik
- “Wishes Fulfilled: Mastering the Art of Manifesting” by Dr. Wayne Dyer
- “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne (also available on Audible or in movie form on YouTube & Netflix)
- “Deliberate Receiving: Finally, the Universe Makes Some Freakin’ Sense!” by Melody Fletcher
- “The Game of Life and How to Play it” by Florence Scovel Shinn (1925) (also available on YouTube)
- “Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power; A Method for Getting What You Want by Getting Off on What You Don’t” by Dr. Carolyn Elliot
- “The Pleasure Zone: Why We Resist Good Feelings & How to Let Go and Be Happy” by Dr. Stella Resnik
For Relationships:
- “The Self-Centered Marriage: The Revolutionary ScreamFree Approach to Rebuilding Your “We” by Reclaiming Your “I” by Hal Runkel, LMFT
- “The Path Between Us: an Enneagram Journey to Healthy Relationships” by Suzanne Stabile
- “Getting Together and Staying Together: Solving the Mystery of Marriage” by Dr. William & Carleen Glasser
- “Eight Lessons for a Happier Marriage” by Dr. William & Carleen Glasser
- “Hold Me Tight” by Dr. Sue Johnson
- “This is Your Brain in Love: New Scientific Breakthroughs for a More Passionate & Emotionally Healthy Marriage” by Dr. Earl Henslin
- “Divorce Busting: A Step-By-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again” by Michele Weiner-Davis, M.S.W.
- “The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships” by Dr. John Gottman & Joan DeClaire
- “The Relationship Handbook” by Dr. George Pransky
- “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by Dr. John Gottman, & Nan Silver
- “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman
- “The Flight from Intimacy: Healing Your Relationship of Counter-Dependency – the Other Side of Co-Dependency” by Drs. Janae & Barry Weinhold
- “Buddhism for Couples: a Calm Approach to Relationships” by Sarah Napthali
Moving Past Infidelity:
- “Getting Past the Affair” by Dr. Douglas Snyder, Dr. Donald Baucom, & Dr. Kristina Coup Gordon
Sexuality:
- “Mating in Captivity” by Esther Perel
- “Sex Without Stress: A Couple’s Guide to Overcoming Disappointment, Avoidance, & Pressure” by Jessa Zimmerman, LMHC
- “The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment” by Jack Morin
- “Mirror of Intimacy: Daily Reflections on Emotional and Erotic Intelligence” by Alexandra Katehakis, MFT
- “The Myth of Sex Addiction” by David Ley
- “Ethical Porn for Dicks: A Man s Guide to Responsible Viewing Pleasure” by David Ley
- “Erotic Intelligence: Igniting Hot, Healthy Sex While Recovering From Sex Addiction” by Alexandra Katehakis, MFT
- “The Sex-Starved Wife: What to do When He’s Lost Desire” by Michele Weiner-Davis, M.S.W.
- “The Sex-Starved Marriage – Boosting Your Marriage Libido, A Couple’s Guide” by Michele Weiner-Davis, M.S.W.
- “Who’s Been Sleeping In Your Head: The Secret World of Sexual Fantasies” by Dr. Brad Kahr
- “Jane Sexes It Up: True Confessions of Feminist Desire” by Merri Lisa Johnson
- “My Secret Garden: Women’s Sexual Fantasies” by Nancy Friday
- “Forbidden Flowers: More Women’s Sexual Fantasies” by Nancy Friday
- “Men in Love – Men’s Sexual Fantasies: The Triumph of Love Over Rage” by Nancy Friday
- “Sex, Sin, and Zen: a Buddhist Exploration of Sex from Celibacy to Polyamory and Everything in Between” by Brad Warner
Sexual Abuse:
- “The Courage to Heal” by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis
Polyamory:
- “Love in Abundance: a Counselor’s Advice on Open Relationships” by Kathy Labriola
- “The Jealousy Workbook: Exercises and Insights for Managing Open Relationships” by Kathy Labriola
- The Polyamory Breakup Book: Causes, Prevention, and Survival by Kathy Labriola
- “Rewriting the Rules: an Integrative Guide to Love, Sex, and Relationships” by Meg Barker
- “Insatiable Wives: Women Who Stray and the Men Who Love Them” by David Ley
- “Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy” by Jessica Fern
- “When Someone You Love Is Polyamorous: Understanding Poly People and Relationships” by Dr. Elisabeth Sheff
- “More Than Two: a Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory” by Franklin Veaux & Eve Rickert
- “The Game Changer: a Memoir of Disruptive Love” by Franklin Veaux
- “The Ethical Slut: a Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Adventures” by Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy
- “Opening Up: a Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships” by Tristan Taormino
- “Open All the Way: Confessions From my Open Marriage” by Sadie Smythe
Kink/ BDSM:
- “Consensual Sadomasochism: How to Talk About it & How to Do It Safely” by Dr. William Henkin and Sybil Holiday
- “Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life” by Justin Lehmiller
- “Safe, Sane, and Consensual: Contemporary Perspectives on Sadomasochism” Edited by Darren Longdridge & Meg Barker
- “The Loving Dominant” by John Warren
- “The New Topping Book” by Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy
- “The New Bottoming Book” by Dossie Easton & Janet Hardy
- “Screw the Roses, Send me the Thorns: The Romance & Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism” by Philip Miller & Molly Devon
- “Playing Well With Others: Your Field Guide to Discovering, Navigating and Exploring the Kink, Leather and BDSM Communities” by Lee Harrington
- “The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge” by Tristan Taormino & Barbara Carrellas
- “BDSM Mastery—Relationships a guide for creating mindful relationships for Dominants and Submissives” by Rubel & Fairfield
- “The Mistress Manual: The Good Girl’s Guide to Female Dominance” by Mistress Lorelei
Tantra/ Sacred Sexuality:
- “Love and Awakening: Discovering the Sacred Path of Intimate Relationship” by John Welwood
- “Tantra Illuminated: The Philosophy, History, and Practice of a Timeless Tradition” by Christopher Wallis
- “Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century” by Barbara Carrellas & Annie Sprinkle
- “Taoist Sexual Meditation: Connecting Love, Energy and Spirit“
- “Expanded Orgasm: Soar to Ecstasy at Your Lover’s Every Touch“
- “Sex Mudras: Energy Movement Exercises for Sexual Vitality“
- “Introduction to Tantra : The Transformation of Desire“
- “Passion Play: Ancient Secrets for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness Through Sensational Sex“
Queer Theory:
- “Virtually Normal: an Argument About Homosexuality” by Andrew Sullivan
- “The Trouble with Normal: Sex, Politics, and the Ethics of Queer Life” by Michael Warner
- “God and the Gay Christian: The Biblical Case in Support of Same-Sex Relationships” by Matthew Vine
Therapeutic Approaches:
- “Counseling with Choice Theory” by Dr. William Glasser
- “Using Reality Therapy” by Robert Wubbolding
- “Reality Therapy for the 21st Century” by Robert Wubbolding
- “The Gift of Therapy: an Open Letter to a New Generation of Therapists and Their Patients” by Irvin Yalom
- “A Way of Being” by Carl Rogers
- “An Introduction to the Internal Family Systems Model” by Dr. Richard Schwartz
- “Parts Work: an Illustrated Guide to Your Inner Life” by Tom Holmes
- “The Mindful Therapist: a Clinician’s Guide to Mindsight and Neural Integration” by Dr. Daniel Siegal
- “Grace Unfolding: Psychotherapy in the Spirit of Tao-te ching” by Greg Johanson & Ronald Kurtz
- “Psychotherapy Without the Self: a Buddhist Perspective” by Dr. Mark Epstein
- “Going on Being: Life at the Crossroads of Buddhism and Psychotherapy” by Dr. Mark Epstein
- “Thoughts Without a Thinker: Psychotherapy from a Buddhist Perspective” by Dr. Mark Epstein